Master Dilettante

Yes, yes, I know he’s busy, but, after all the hullabaloo, JH still has not responded to the “Reasonable” Dinner Time survey results. At my desk last Monday, he briefly read the post on results and immediately replied, “These people are lying.” That remark alone reveals all you need know about his objectivity.

He promised to trash my post, and I eagerly continue to await that — in the same way Vladimir and Estragon waited for Godot. I shan’t hold my breath.

JH, you write a retort in comments or send it to me, and I promise to approve it/post it here.

Thanks to those who completed the Dinner Time survey!

Now, the background: I have a standing weekly Wednesday dinner with three buddies — one person picks a place and pays each week. The default meeting time is 7:30 p.m, but our empirical meeting times have ranged from ~7:00 p.m. - ~8:30 p.m., and, regardless, the weekly picker/payer chooses.

I would prefer to plan to meet for dinner around 7:00 p.m., because:

• I leave the office before then
• We almost always start late (and I am a culprit!)
• I believe it’s better to eat earlier in the evening to have more time to metabolize the food
• I prefer that my final meal of the day end several hours before bedtime (our meals run perhaps two hours on average)
• That’s when I’m hungry and want to eat.

One of my buddies — let’s call him Jessie Heed-’em-no (or “JH”*) — in contrast, tends to leaves the office later than I do, might exercise and then eat some days, stays up later and wakes in the morning later.

No problem. He can pick his starting time and I can pick mine, right? Wrong! Last Wednesday, I had the gall to suggest a 6:30 p.m. dinner time — because the restaurant, a BBQ dive, closed at 8:00 p.m. — and met with staunch resistance from JH, the same resistance he’s presented to milder extent even with 7:00 p.m. meeting times. (Similarly, I’ll readily admit I’ve whined about dinner times later than 7:30 p.m.).

Now, in general, I respond better to sincere requests than to what I’m typically presented by JH when I suggest earlier dinner times: disparaging ad hominem attacks about my age, belittlement of my current workload and assertions that I am “unreasonable.” With regard to the last, JH bombastically asserted that, if we polled others, I would be revealed as patently “unreasonable” in wanting to eat on the early side. Thus the survey.

Thirty-five people — obviously not statistically significant — responded. Without further adieu, here are the results (click on each graph for a larger image). Read the data, and you be the judge.

Question #1: Around what time do you usually start eating dinner?

Question #2: Ideally, around what time would you prefer to start eating dinner?

Question #3: What is the earliest time you believe it is “reasonable” to start eating dinner?

Question #4: What is the latest time you believe it is “reasonable” to start eating dinner?

Question #5: What do you consider to be your home country?

For this last question 5, the four “other” responses were “nigeria,” “jason’s big round belly,” “India, since I learned my dinner habits there,” and “Italy.”

With regard to methodology, of course this survey is imperfect, because it fails to consider demographics. Parents will skew the actual and preferred eating times towards the earlier side, certain geographies (Europeans, New Yorkers, etc.) will tend to skew towards the later side, age is a factor and profession no doubt will influence results. In particular, JH argues that for young professionals in the Silicon Valley or perhaps at eBay in particular, certain dinner times are inherently unreasonable.

My conclusion, with which JH undoubtedly will disagree, is that, if I am “unreasonable,” then others, too, are “unreasonable” with me. I’ve shared with JH an initial draft of this post, and he’s already telling me I’ve entirely missed the point of all of his arguments and that my position is indefensible. To be clear, my positions, including those not articulated above, are:

• Treat your friends with civility and respect
• You don’t have to be right all the time, and you don’t get your way all the time
• “Reasonable” necessarily encompasses a broad range of beliefs, all of which are acceptable.

Q.E.D.

JH, you can respond in comments, which I promise I’ll approve.

____________________________________
*Any resemblance to real people could be purely coincidental.

I’m engaged in a debate with a friend on when is a “reasonable” time to start eating dinner in the U.S. So as not to prejudice your thinking, I won’t indicate more at this point.

To help us inform this debate, please complete this 5-question, “Dinner Time” Survey. Also, please feel free to post any comments on this blog.

Thanks! We’ll post the results once known.

In this age of fast food, mass market franchise restaurants and celebrity chefs, the decent family and neighborhood restaurant is hard to find. My new favorite Italian restaurant is A Bellagio in Campbell. Not only is the food authentic and delicious, but the service is unparalleled. I’d already written a Yelp review and felt compelled to update it after lunch today:

You MUST eat at A Bellagio regularly. I mentioned before that the food is outstanding and that the service is impeccable. Just when I thought the service was great, the owner today went above and beyond the call of duty and completely blew my mind.

Three friends and I arrived for lunch and, to our chagrin, discovered that it was closed due to some construction work on the the air conditioning system. The owner immediately recognized me from past visits. After a moment in which he registered his disappointment that they were closed for lunch, he immediately exclaimed, “Never mind! Come sit down! We’ll serve you lunch!” Again, THEY WERE CLOSED! And yet the owner of this authentic, neighborhood family joint opened the restaurant just to serve me and three friends!

But wait! There’s more! Yes, the air conditioning was under repair, but he turned it on just for us, so that my pregnant friend (see Patricia N.’s review below) would be comfortable. AND he then insisted that we not even pay for the meal!!! We, of course, insisted the opposite and left a generous amount (we didn’t receive a bill) and tip for the waiter.

This generosity takes customer service to the ultimate level. Of course, I wouldn’t presume anything when visiting, but know that it’s a great place with a great, homey feel. Coupled with the excellent food, A Bellagio is my favorite Italian place. Whoever you are, you must try it!!!
____________________________________________

Original Review:
Delicious Italian food coupled with impeccable service in a personable, neighborhood restaurant.

I’ve been to A Bellagio twice now and experienced delicious meals both times. I haven’t the education to classify the region of Italy from which the food hails, but everything I’ve tried has been delicious.

Last night, I tried two specials, an appetizer of mozzarella and tomatoes topped with prosciutto; a particular name exists for the dish, but that name eludes me at the moment. Just like mozzarella caprese but with prosciutto to boot. I didn’t ask, but the mozzarella was soft and creamy and light and undoubtedly made on the premises. I also had a dinner special of rigatoni with a prime rib meat sauce. That’s right, prime rib. Fantastic.

I’ve sampled other dishes, and everything I’ve tried I’ve enjoyed.

The wine list is plentiful. And the desserts are quite tasty. I’ve sampled the chocolate torturo, the chocolate mousse, the zabaglione and the cheesecake. All were excellent.

I’ve been here twice with a Campbell friend who dines at the restaurant once a week. The owner and wait staff all know him and provide friendly, efficient service. The owner poured us complimentary limoncello shots, too.

An excellent Italian choice, in the neighborhood of Campbell or any other neighborhood for that matter.

See all of my reviews on Yelp!

I’m going to continue to post my restaurant reviews both on Yelp and here. This week, “the dinner club” checked out Pezzella’s on El Camino in Sunnyvale. Here’s my review:

My colleague John C. tells me my Yelp reviews are too long to read, so I’ll keep this one relatively short.

Pezzella’s is a great neighborhood Italian joint, with hearty, tasty dishes. The ambiance and decor are casual; it’s a place for family & friends, not dates.

Everything served is traditionally American Italian. The garlic knots (twists of bread slathered in garlic and butter and tomatoes and herbs) are off-menu and worth trying. The chicken Parmesan (which I just about always get), the mozzarella caprese, the baked rigatoni — all are classic and delicious. The wine list is serviceable, and the service is friendly.

I’d repeat here for a casual dinner with good friends.

See all of my reviews on Yelp.

(Photo courtesy Yelp user Anthony M.)

My brother and sister would like to see my Yelp reviews here, so I shall oblige.

I have a standing weekly dinner with three buddies. Each week, one person picks and pays. This week, Jason H. picked Junnoon in Palo Alto. Here’s my Yelp review of it:

Tasty, although certainly not authentic Indian. (My ex-roommate Shanthini R. would concur, I’m certain).

Junnoon occupies the space formerly occupied by a bad sushi restaurant just off the corner of University & High in downtown Palo Alto. The interior has been redecorated with modern furniture and rich colors, and the lighting might be good for a first date, I would think. The ambient noise is just right — not so noisy that conversation is difficult and not so quiet that the conversations of adjacent diners are conspicuously audible.

While waiting for a table, we tried the mojitos, which obviously aren’t Indian. But the bartender made a very good one here. And once seated, the waitress immediately brought roti and a addictive dipping sauce with peanut and coconut.

The menu markets. Conforming to the wisdom described in the book Mindless Eating, each item is described with positive adjectives.

For appetizers, we ordered the Darjeeling Steamed Wontons, Bombay Crab and Cob Cake and Tangy Semolina Shells. All were just a little bit different and interesting and good but not particularly special. I’m not sure what about the wontons and seafood cakes were Indian, if anything. The semolina shells reminded me of deep fried risotto or mac & cheese.

For main dishes, we ordered the Tandoori Black Pepper Steak, Old Delhi-Style Chicken (tikka), Rice-Flaked Sea Bass, Prawns in Coconut Mustard Sauce, and Junnoon Chicken Kaathi Roll (egg-washed paratha bread filled tandoori chicken tika and mint chutney). I thought the pepper steak was tough and tasteless, but one of my fellow diners (a beef fanatic) liked it best among all the entrees. The Delhi-style chicken was the most traditional dish we sampled and my favorite. The sea bass was okay, I recommend against the prawns and the Kaathi roll was different and worth trying.

Overall, I thought the service was great, the food good and the prices a bit steep for Indian. If I really wanted Indian, I’d go to Amber or (formerly) Sue’s in Mountain View.

See all of my reviews on Yelp.

Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Think by Brian Wansink, Ph.D., is a fantastic book for anyone trying to control his or her diet. The book does not prescribe a particular diet — you won’t find a single menu or food choice in it. Rather, the book uses anecdotes and studies to demonstrate that a plethora of environmental factors influence how much and what we eat. The unstated presumption is that awareness is the first step in change. Each chapter describes a principle that causes overeating or eating poorly and then provides practical solutions. The solutions are common-sense yet compelling in their simplicity. Still, as with any diet, discipline is the key to success.

A summary of each chapter:

• Think 20 Percent—More or Less. “We overeat because there are signals and cues around us that tell us to eat.” Wansink describes two experiments, one in which subjects tended to eat more popcorn when given larger bags than when given smaller bags and one in which California-branded wine enhanced the overall perception of a meal relative to South Dakota-branded wine. Because Americans tend to stop eating when full rather than when no longer hungry, eaters should dish out 20% less than they think they want to eat and, in doing so, when it comes to fruits and vegetables, dish out 20% more.
• See All You Eat. Lack of awareness of the quantity we are consuming allows us to overeat. For example, study subjects that continuously saw the bones of the chicken wings they consumed ate fewer than study subjects for whom the bones were continuously cleared. Prison inmates in the Midwest gained 20-25 pounds over six months, because their orange baggy jumpsuits concealed that they were gaining weight. And diners eating from rigged, “bottomless” soup bowls ate 50% more than those eating from normal soup bowls. “See it before you eat it” by pre-plating all food to be consumed and “see it while you eat it” by leaving, for example, empty wine bottles and glasses on a table when pouring fresh glasses.
• Be Your Own Tablescaper. The “tablescape” is “the placement and types of dishes, silverware, drinking glasses, and serving bowls” and “is filled with hidden persuaders” that can increase or decrease how much we eat. American kitchens and food packages tend to be larger than in other parts of the world and lead Americans to make bigger meals and eat more food. For example, study subjects given larger boxes of spaghetti, larger jars of spaghetti sauce and more ground beef prepared 23% larger meals than those given smaller boxes — and diners in both cases ate 92% of what was served. Control the tablescape by (1) mini-sizing boxes and bowls (repackage larger boxes into smaller bags and containers), (2) becoming an illusionist (serve food on smaller plates and beverages in taller, thinner glasses) and (3) being aware of the “double danger of leftovers” (take a limited amount of leftovers out of the refrigerator to avoid overconsumption).
• Make Overeating a Hassle, Not a Habit. Most people are on “See-Food” diets, eating everything they see. Opaque-covered dishes of candy in an office get consumed from less than clear-covered dishes (out of sight, out of mind), and the knowledge that donuts are in the office kitchen makes them more likely to be consumed; the same power of suggestion works for healthy foods, too. At warehouse clubs like Costco, individuals tend to spend and buy more — of jumbo-sized packages. Create barriers to overconsumption: (1) “leave serving dishes in the kitchen or on a sideboard” (out of reach), (2) “‘de-convenience’ tempting foods” (e.g., store them in remote areas of a pantry or at the back of the refrigerator) and (3) “snack only at the table and on a clean plate” (making impulse snacking “less convenient to serve, eat, and clean up”).
• Create Distraction-Free Eating Scripts. We tend to follow routines, or “eating scripts” when we eat. We tend to eat more when eating with family or friends who eat a lot or quickly. Men tend to overeat and women tend to under-eat on dates. And everyone tends to eat more while watching TV. Certain types of cuisine, odors and even the weather influence what and how much we eat. Re-script your diet danger zones (the patterns of eating) around dinners, snacks, parties, restaurants and desks/dashboards. Distract yourself before you snack (”make your snacking life less distracting and less alluring by eating in one room only, such as the dining room and kitchen”). And serve yourself before you start (dish out rations rather than eating directly from a box, bag or serving bowl).
• Create Expectations That Make You a Better Cook. “Taste” is as much mental as physical; we taste what we expect to taste. Soldiers eating in the dark couldn’t differentiate between strawberry and chocolate yogurt. Lemon Jello dyed red could be mistaken for cherry Jello. Menu descriptions and brands affect food perceptions. When serving food, use positive and descriptive words — any adjective! — to make healthy food taste better. Also, fix the atmosphere when you fix the food (soft lights, soft music, soft colors, nice plates, nice tablecloth, nice glasses — the details matter).
• Make Comfort Foods More Comforting. Comfort foods can be both healthy and unhealthy, and what comforts varies by gender. The comfort comes from conditioning from prior associations, often from childhood. Wansink advises against depriving yourself of comfort foods but instead eat them in smaller amounts and emphasize the healthy ones. He also suggests rewiring comfort foods by developing routines featuring smaller portions and healthier combinations.
• Crown Yourself as the Official Gatekeeper. A “nutritional gatekeeper” in a family controls around 72 percent of what the family eats and, over the course of a child’s early life, affects that child’s food preferences. Be a good marketer of healthy food when describing it, offer a wide variety of foods to children, fill half of every main meal plate with vegetables, salad, etc. and make serving sizes official by giving snacks in children in sealed bags or other containers (avoiding the sight of extra snacks).
• Portion-Size Me. Fast food appeals to our desire for variety, convenience and value. Fast food restaurants have begun to make nutritional information more available, but consumers don’t actually read the information or monitor caloric intake. Consumers tend to believe Subway is more healthy than McDonald’s because of Subway’s marketing of health claims. Similarly, food labels in grocery stores can provide the illusion that food is healthier than it is. “Beware of the health halo” that allows people to eat significantly more quantities of a food perceived as healthy. Also, “think small or super-share” by ordering smaller combinations, discarding extra fries on the way to the table or ordering a value meal combination and sharing it with another.
• Mindlessly Eating Better. Finally, Wansink concludes with a chapter on “Mindlessly Eating Better.” He recognizes that better eating means different things to different people, from eating less to eating without guilt to eating more nutritiously to eating with greater enjoyment. Wansink suggests individuals follow the chapter-ending tips he provides. Two additional tips are (1) making food-trade-offs (bargaining for when and what to eat) and (2) developing food policies (e.g., serve 20% less, no second helpings of any starch, no eating at the desk, etc.). Wansink sugests choosing three (3) 100-calorie changes in a year.

Does any of this work? I lost five pounds in one month simply by eating a . . . little . . . bit . . . less. I’ve been departing from a number of the suggestions lately and gaining some of that weight back, but I’m so confident in the lessons that I know exactly how to get rid of it again!

For more information, buy the book and see Wansink’s Web site on Mindless Eating.