Beware of the spoilers below!
Last night’s season finale episode, “The Job,” may have been the very best from all three seasons. Among the many great lines & moments, here were my favorites:
- “Hey, what’s different about you? You look worse.” — Kevin, on Jim’s haircut
- “You got a haircut. It’s sexy hot. . . . Turn around. . . . Do it!” — Meredith, also on Jim’s haircut
- “Pam is . . . kind of a bitch.” — Karen, after Karen’s apology to her
- “You know what? Don’t even worry about it. Everyone was so drunk I bet no one even remembers what you said.” — Meredith, on Pam’s outburst at the lake
- “I remember. I blogged the whole thing. W-W-W dot CreedThoughts dot gov dot W-W-W backslash CreedThoughts. Check it out.” — Creed
- “Last year, Creed asked me how to set up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed’s brain, I opened up a Word document on his computer and put an address at the top. I’ve read some of it. Even for the Internet, it’s . . . pretty shocking.” — Ryan, on Creed’s blog
- “I sold it on eBay. The buyer was very motivated, as was I. It went for 80% of what I paid. Sold it in record time.” — Michael, on selling his condo at a discount
- “No, Dwight, I don’t care if that’s how they consolidated power in ancient Rome.” — Angela, responding to Dwight’s question “How would you like to spend the night with the Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin, Scranton?”
- “Okay, just so I understand it, in your wildest fantasy, you are in hell, and you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.” — Jim, on Dwight’s wildest fantasy
- “So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer, but he is unavailable, fictional and overqualified.” — Dwight
- “She made me do a lot of things I didn’t want to do” - Michael, on how Jan might force him to get back together with her
- “I would never do that — waste of money. In my experience, guys are way more attracted to the back of you than in the front.” — Kate, on Jan’s boob job
- “I find it offensive. Au naturel, baby, that’s how I like ‘em. Swing low, sweet chariots.” — Creed, on Jan’s boob job
- “I’ll tell you this: It is not because of the boob job — excuse me, boob enhancement. That would be shallow, and this is the opposite of shallow. This is emotionally magnificent.” — Michael, justifying why he was getting back together with Jan
- “I guess we’re getting back together. Your advice was good, but Jan’s was bigger.” — Michael, justifying why he was getting back together with Jan
- “That is ‘Beardie.’ . . . That’s not his real name. That’s just what I call him.” — Michael, naming a Dunder Mifflin employee whose name he doesn’t know
- “Three months ago I was nowhere. I was just a Cornell grad in anger management. But look where I am now. Not bad.” Andy, while washing Dwight’s spit cup
- “Just say I want to squeeze them. It’s code. She’ll know what it means.” — Michael, asking Jan’s administrative assistant to take a message for her
- “Well, I guess you could come and stay at my condo. I think I could back out of the sale, probably get some negative feedback on my eBay profile.” — Michael
- “Live together . . . actually, wait a minute. This could be great. This could be perfect. You know, my full-time job could be our relationship. I could wear stretch pants and wait for you to come home at 5:15. It could work. This could work, really.” — Jan
- “Ryan, coffee. . . . No, it’s for me, bimbo.” — Michael, asking Ryan for coffee and responding to his response, “I don’t do that stuff anymore.”
- “Jim and I are just too similar. Maybe one day I’ll find my own Karen. But — that is — a — you know — not — a man, a man version.” — Pam
- Pam’s sweet smile when Jim asked her out to dinner
- “It’ll be nice to have another MBA around here.” — David, offering Ryan a job
It’ll be a long wait until the new season in the fall. I’m already shuddering at the thought of how the writers might resolve the love triangle among Jim, Pam & Karen. By the way, why doesn’t the biographical profile of the actress playing Karen appear on The Office Web site? Should we infer anything from the omission???
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